Lets Talk About: What They Don't Tell You!

3/30/2017

Hello Lovelies,

Welcome back to the new post in mine and Jess' "Lets Talk About" series, this week we'll be discussing all the things they don't tell you about growing up, from periods to drinking, we've got your girls guide to growing up covered, telling you all the little nitty gritty things no-one else ever did.

You can see mine and Jess' advice on four topics on my blog and then another four on her's.

But for now, on my blog we're going to be discussing what they don't tell you about moving out, periods, getting tattoo's and drinking!


Moving Out

Laura - 
From my personal experience, moving out is the exact opposite of everything you expect and plan it to be. Don't get me wrong, it's amazing, but impossible to prepare for! If you're like me you'll tell yourself that you'll start/stop doing a million things when you move out. For example, "i'll start making my bed" or "i'll stop leaving my washing up until the next day". While you will certainly develop your own habits and routine, it'll take time, and it'll never be perfect! I spent so much time in the first few weeks kicking myself because i broke the promises i made to myself, I just eventually had to realise that nobody is perfect and that I was developing my own little way of doing things that works for me. So, i think the main thing people don't tell you about moving out is that it's a long and messy journey of figuring out exactly who you are, and how your life best works for you ! 

Jess-
Something that everyone will face one day and the one thing that I could not wait for. I moved out of my family home into student halls but they were luxurious. I had a fab room with my own en-suite and then a huge kitchen/living area. My halls may have been luxurious but I definitely did not live with luxurious people, one of them was a complete scutter. This is where I get onto what I wish someone would have told me. I turned up to uni with my Nan's old Denby kitchen stuff, so I was very protective of it and get very annoyed if it was being abused by my awful flatmate. I really wish someone would have said actually go to Asda and buy 50p plates and cups as you probably will be lumped with someone who will ruin it. There were many occasions where I would bleach and then wash my plates and cups because they had used them and let them go mouldy and suffering with OCD did not help. So I'm giving you the advice now, if you are moving into shared accommodation don't take nice stuff that will be accessible to anyone as I can guarantee there will be somebody who will, to be frank, take the piss with it and the more you run around and clear up after them so your stuff doesn't get completely ruined the more they will do it.


Periods

Laura - 
Ah yes, periods. That wonderful topic that for some reason, we all act as though it's a taboo. I think one thing I wish someone had told me when i first started my periods is that, in most cases, they get better! With every period you have, you become one step closer to conquering those painful little sods! Everybody has their way of dealing period pain, talk to people, get some ideas, try them all, see what works for you. For me, a heat pack and nap does this trick! However, at 16 I went on the contraceptive pill as it is known to dramatically reduce period pain, and when i was missing 4 days of school every month because i was in so much pain, it was needed! I would recommend trying some home remedies first, because they can work wonders, but if you do get very intense period pain, i strongly suggest talking to your doctor and seeing what they can do - they've heard it all before! Don't fret though, in most cases your period will regulate themselves as you get older, so you can start planning for your unwanted house guests, and you'll nearly always find a way to kick their ass!

Jess-

I was terrified about starting my periods because I'd heard so many horrific things from girls at my school. So when I had my first period I literally didn't even know, I just thought I had got funny coloured discharge, is that tmi?! It was only the following month the same happened again so I asked my mom and she broke the news to me that I'd started my periods! For the first year or so they were really regular and I didn't particularly suffer with period pains and then when I turned about 14 the pains started getting really bad, I was bleeding way heavier than normal and it was just horrid. I am very much a pull your big girl pants up and get on with it so I never wanted to moan and whinge about them as some women have it way worse. Fast forward a year and I was in my first proper (by proper I mean sexually active) relationship so I went on the injection and hallelujah my periods stopped, six years later and I've still not had one, it's wonderful! I think a lot of people have that attitude that we should just get on with it because it's the most natural thing for our bodies to do but from my own personal experience, if you are suffering get yourself to the doctors and see what they can do to help, that is completely fine. There are forms of contraception out there that can help ease bad periods. Recently I was made to feel like absolute rubbish by a nurse who didn't like the fact that at that point in my life I wasn't sexually active but was still on the injection and she very much tried to pressure me in to coming off it, even though I do not want to. I spoke to my own nurse and she has no concerns that I'm using the contraception to keep the periods at bay and she isn't worried at all. It's my body and my choice what I do with it. I'd also like to think that I am protected for any circumstances that arise. Don't let anyone ever try and tell you what to do with your own body, as long as you know what the risks are and are completely happy with what you're doing then it's your choice, even if that is using contraception to stop or ease your periods.


Getting Tattoo's

Laura-
I'm not going to sit here and pretend that I'm an expert when it comes to tattoos, mainly because those serial tattooers will laugh at me! But there are a few things I wish i'd known before i got my first tattoo. The first one is THINK, THINK, THINK, whatever you get will be on your body forever so you need to think about three key things; what to get, where to get it, and who's going to do it. All of these are so important as not thoroughly thinking about just one of these things can lead to a botched tattoo that you hate! Luckily, I love mine, and the artist did an amazing job! Another thing I wish I'd known is that getting a tattoo on your ribs hurts like a mother-trucker and the pain can't be described or anticipated. For example, when I was being tattoo'd at the bottom of my ribs, I got a really bad pain in my nipple - weird and unexpected! Finally, if you can't afford to get it done properly, don't do it! It doesn't matter if your friend offers you "mates rates", you know whether they're capable enough of doing the tattoo you want, if they're not, save up your money and go elsewhere!

Jess-
Ever since I was a little kid I had always wanted tattoos! I love the idea of being covered in artwork that everyone can see. For my 18th birthday my parents had promised me faithfully that they would pay for a tattoo for me, I'm 22 this year and still waiting for it to happen, so when I moved to university I decided I would get a tattoo, only something small and cute. Some kids go to uni and do drugs, I got a heart tattooed on my lower left forearm! I'll be completely honest I was absolutely crapping myself about getting it done, I'm petrified of needles and I don't really cope well with pain. So I get to the tattoo shop and am papping myself, trying to talk myself out of it with every excuse under the sun but at the same time psyching myself up and talking myself into it! The tattooist must have thought I was mental. We went into the room and I find out she's got a silent tattoo gun which instantly puts my mind at ease as the noise goes straight through me, she starts doing it and I honestly can hand on heart sit here and say it was one of the least painful, pain driven things I've felt. It's very niggly and irritating but not painful, this could have been because of where I got it as I know it is painful if its on bone but that would make sense! I would recommend getting your first tattoo on a fleshy part of your body so you get a feel for the sensation!


Drinking

Laura - 
While this is a serious topic that should not be taken light-heartedly, I'm not going to sit here and preach at you, saying that "drinking is bad" or "you shouldn't do it". The problem with drinking is that it can so easily become a problem, without you realising it. I see this all the time at university! By 'problem' I don't necessarily mean alcoholism (although this is something that can happen to), i'm more referring to the state you get yourself in when drinking. Only once in my life have I been blackout drunk. So drunk i didn't know how i got home or what had happened the night before. Luckily for me, this happened at a party where i was surrounded with friends to take care of me, and not around strangers. Some people aren't so fortunate. All i'll say on this matter is that binge drinking is an incredibly dangerous habit. Having the best night of your life, to then not have those memories in the morning is a horrific feeling. If you choose to drink, do it safely! Drink and be merry, and then stop, drink some water, and get home safe. 

Jess-
I will hold my hands up high now and admit that I'm a bit of a lightweight. Its cheap for me on a night out. I hardly ever go out or drink really though and there were definitely points where my friends thought I was boring because I wouldn't go out clubbing with them. I have never seen the appeal to going out, I'd much rather have my friends round and have a few drinks with them and thats fine. Clubs are way too expensive. My first night out when I moved to Cambridge I spent £10 entry and then probably £30 on drinks. That's extortionate, a bottle of echo falls is £5 from co-op and that keeps me more than happy. It's easy to give in and just go out if you're friends are but it really is about weighing up if its worth it, the sting to your bank account, the hangover the next morning or even those horrible drunk regrets. If these aren't worth it see if your friends would rather come round for a few social drinks, if they don't there is nothing wrong with you staying in having a glass of wine and watching a soppy rom-com by yourself!

Check out the rest of our post over on Jess' blog!

Until Next Time, 

Laura & Jess xoxo

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